Don't Lay Your Eggs in My Torso Bitch

Trixie and I are starting to merge into a single high functioning being. Like how all those dead people inhabited that little girl at the end of 'Being John Malchovich" except (I think) there are only two of us.It's getting out of hand.
Trixie is my business partner. For ten years I thought- I can never work with anyone.
Mainly because-
I tried it once and the girl ended up being psychotic and lazy.
2. I am a control freak about my business.

Or used to be. In the last few months I've realized that I've been in a slow decline of Burnout for a few years.
"I could sew that dress." I think."Or I could watch Tyra."
I love having a TV but it does interfere with my work. For seven months all I had was a tiny portable DVD player-the kind you can take in the car. The only DVD I had was The Bourne Identity because- like the sheets-I kept forgetting to buy more movies at the thrift store.
"I love me some Matt Damon," I would think "But I am tired of watching him flip around in the air kicking people's asses. That German girl should totally dump him. Emotionally distant." I would analyse it like I was writing a thesis. had every word memorized cause I'd seen it 8,000 times.

Then I started hanging out with Trixie. She gets things done on time, doesn't ever procrastinate and lie about why the orders are late.
"My dog died." I will say "It's going to be another week."
"I didn't know you had a dog. Where was it when I came over for my fitting?"
"In the yard." I say.
"You don't have a fence." They frown.
"He was a really smart dog."

Trixie doesn't do this kind of bullshit.
And since we've become 50/50 partners-I don't do it either. Mostly because I am afraid of her.

"SUNNY!" I hear her yelling from the studio.
"Shit," I think. "I must have left a snickers bar to melt in the fabric piles again. Maybe I can blame it on Ruby."
I go down to the studio and she gives me this look. You know the one. The why can't you just be normal? one.

"Did you leave the door open? because a cat got in and peed on the carpet." she is very unhappy, but I want to laugh. I restrain myself. Because she might smack me.
"Coco brought her cat over here one day and locked it in the studio." I tell her.
Now the heat is off me. She's annoyed at Coco.
"Who brings their cat to someone's house." she asks.
I shrug.
"She was drinking all that vodka. Maybe she was drunk."
"Ok." she says. "Go upstairs and make the sales calls."
And I do. Even though "Law and Order" is on and I don't feel like working.

Since she's not a man I don't mind the bossing. I kind of love it. It's not just fear that inspires me to be more responsible since Trixie has come along but love.
I was burning out because I was getting lonely working at home.
I don't have a husband anymore-and while I love being alone it can be a little much sometimes. Plus-ten years with no co-workers to go to lunch with. Ten years.

Now we finish each other's sentences and watch each others kids. She's like a sister to me.
She calls me every five minutes about work bullshit and it doesn't annoy me.
" We just got our business checks in! They sent them in a fancy binder!" She gets excited about this kind of shit, which makes me excited.
"Awesome!" I tell her."I'm going back to Tyra."

The other day we were texting while I was driving to get a Red Bull so I could stay up all night to finish a deadline before Trish yelled at me for putting it off.

"Im turning into u. forgot to give you the money from the Japan order. u r turning into me cause u r remembering stuff lately." she wrote.

"We are merging." I wrote."Like Sigourney Weaver and the Alien. Don't lay your eggs in my chest bitch."

She is not afraid of me. "I will if I feel like it. Thats how i roll. Get used to it"

"I will go to Home depot and buy that fire blower things she torched it with in the end and burn you to a crisp while you shriek and writhe." I wrote "I hate it when people lay their eggs in my torso."

But she is smart.
"I should rent that movie so I know what to expect and can plan a defense."

"We should rent them. I know the kids would like it. Ruby is four now after all."

"No." she wrote."I want to see The Bourne Identity. Have you seen that? It's good."

"FUCK.YOU" I wrote.
But I was laughing. Because I would totally watch the Bourne Identity with Trixie.
And not even get annoyed.